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Moms and Special-Needs World

Mother's Views On Special-NeedsI've stumbled upon a recent and very interesting survey done by the Parents Magazine.

This study/survey focused on the children with special needs and the fact that they are more and more tightly integrated within existing communities that may or may not support their efforts.

The fact that surprised me the most is that 15 percent of mothers thought that children with special needs (just based on the diagnosis) should not be together with their school peers.

This provides a sobering look at how parents with or without kids with special needs try to work with the system and navigate all these obstacles.



There's been a massive sea change in how we view children who are not developing as expected, or, in other words, children who have special needs. From growing numbers of special-needs PTAs, playgrounds, camps, and toys to Pinterest's "Special Needs Blogs" board (3,500 pins and counting) to plotlines of the TV show Parenthood, physical, mental, and behavioral conditions that were once hidden away in specialized schools and doctors' offices are now woven into mainstream society in ways we haven't seen before. The prevalence of parent-reported childhood developmental disabilities jumped 17 percent between 1997 and 2008, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. This works out to nearly 10 million children. The most recent data show that one in 88 kids has a diagnosis of autism.

For the April 2014 issue of Parents, we created a 20-page section devoted to the special-needs world that we all inhabit, whether or not we have a diagnosis. Teaming up with Quester, a research company in Des Moines, we surveyed nearly 500 moms of children ages 3 to 12, roughly divided between those whose kids have special needs and those whose kids are typically developing. To define just which diagnoses fall into that first group, we looked to the Individuals With Disabilities Education Act, the federal special education law that ensures public schools serve children with disabilities. We settled on conditions that require intervention and accommodations at school -- including ADHD; autism spectrum disorder; developmental delays and disabilities such as Down syndrome; epilepsy; hearing and vision impairment; behavioral/conduct disorders; arthritis and joint problems; and physical disabilities such as cerebral palsy.

Some of the survey's most enlightening findings:

  • Only about 15 percent of all the moms surveyed believe children should be separated from their peers in school based on a diagnosis.

  • One in four moms of typically developing kids wonder whether their child needs to be evaluated because of a potential developmental disorder.

  • Only 17 percent of moms of kids with special needs say children's conditions are overdiagnosed today. The number jumps to 30 percent among moms of typically developing kids.

  • 89 percent of moms of kids with special needs say their children seem pleased with their social network. Meanwhile, 79 percent of moms of typically developing kids gave the same response.

  • 73 percent of moms whose kids have special needs have talked to their children about people with special needs; 81 percent of moms of typically developing kids have had that discussion.

  • 32 percent of moms whose kids have special needs will acknowledge another child's special needs with that child's parents, compared to 22 percent of moms of typically developing kids.


Moms were very candid in their responses. This is what mothers of children who have special needs want other moms to know:

  • "I may look tough, but know that I'm as fragile as my child. I just don't have the option to show it."

  • "Please don't tell me to just relax. There is always something to be done: doctor appointments, therapy appointments, insurance people to talk to, papers to be filled out, extra encouragement and praise and attention to be given. It's exhausting."

  • "We often can't do activities other people with kids the same age do, [but] I still relish the adult friendships [with moms whose kids don't have special needs]."

  • "Be more sensitive when bragging about [your] typically developing kids. Even though we are blessed and thankful for our kiddos, [we also] feel sadness for not being able to experience certain things that other people might take for granted."


Do You Know What Your Wife Wants For Her Birthday?

Gift For Your WifeA husband would know what his wife likes, better than anyone else. So finding her the perfect birthday presents for her and making her happy wouldn’t be a Herculean task. Women love to get attention, especially from the one they adore the most. Many men seem to find it difficult to express their love, so here are a few tips to sort that out.

So, on her birthday, making her a beautiful dinner and having it in the midst of candles would take her to the seventh heaven and she’ll eat it to the last morsel.

Men who are not masters in culinary arts, could take their significant other for a romantic dinner by the beach. Going out for a romantic movie or watching it at home would be a mood elevator.

One could pick movies like When Harry met Sally or eternal classics like Casablanca, or Gone with the Wind.

A woman loves jewelry no matter how old she is and she never really stops wanting more. Getting her a piece of jewelry on her birthday will make her smile and giggle like a teenager.

If she is an ardent reader, gift her a book that she had been craving to read for a very long time. Or, if she is a technology buff, an iPad would make a lovely gift.

Gifts to avoid on your wife’s birthday would be a blender, a vacuum cleaner, knife sets, washing machine and appliances that come under that group. Anyone of this would definitely turn her off and explaining to her why you gifted her any of these would be a big hardship for you.

Three-dimensional Approach to Cellulite Treatment

Cellulite TreatmentCellulite is a problem that affects most women and the outside appearance of the skin leads to unpleasant self-confidence problems.

Tips for treating cellulite recommend the different methods of quitting drinking liquid fats and sweets. But now experts recommend for the first time, a three-dimensional vision of treating cellulite.

How Does Cellulite Appear?

Under the skin, fat is grouped in bags, separated each other by walls perpendicular fibers that bind the skin, the deeper layers of muscle and fat package. Thus, any changes in volume of these packages of fat produces and promotes skin traction outlining, creating the appearance of orange peel.

Treatment involves a complete three-dimensional remodeling areas with cellulite. Treatment is effective because it addresses all skin defects: flaccid skin, fibrous walls and increase the volume of adipocytes.

Dimensional treatment includes:

- Removing the fibrous walls with a small under-incision;
- Reshaping fat Shock Wave
- Reduction of skin laxity with radio-frequency.

The program includes several sessions — both surgical and laser procedures.

An Alma Accent RF device reduces the appearance of loose skin where cellulite is visible on. Cutaneous tissue shrinks as a true natural corset reducing cellulite effect. It takes a full 10 days, and the results can be observed after at least 3 treatments.

Shock Wave Treatment reshaping fat volume and consists of 2-3 sessions per week, completely painless.

Surgical correction addresses the limited areas where cellulite can “liposhifting” (smoothing package without extracting fat) or sub-incision operation, which are sectioned under the skin that produce the fibrous bundles of orange peel with a needle.

The surgical procedure requires local anesthesia and the patient will go home after several hours wearing a corset designed to help a beautiful healing. The procedure is especially the gluteal area and requires a healing period of several weeks.

Choosing Between Grandparents and a Babysitter

Grandparents or a BabysitterIdeally, newborn babies should stay as long as possible with his parents, especially his mother. Only when he’s three years old, the child is psychologically prepared from spending several hours away from his family.

But we should all agree that nowadays, there are unfortunate cases, when the mother can’t deal with the baby for too long (maybe only a few months, sometimes even a few days) and that’s when families resort to nannies — a woman paid to take care of the child — or to grandparents.

Both have advantages and disadvantages.
Why did I choose the nanny, to the detriment of grandparents – assuming that parents can afford (from a financial point of view):

– a nanny usually follow the instructions and requirements of the parents; there are only a few cases in which the nanny tries to impose its own views about raising and educating children;
– she can have a professional qualification or studies on the rearing of children;
– she’s likely to have a larger experience (sometimes more current) in terms of care and child rearing;
– she tends to spoil the child less than a grandparent would;

On top of that, if parents are not satisfied with the work or if there is any sort of incompatibility the contract can be terminated in a jiffy.

But why would you choose the grandparents over a babysitter?

– it’s all about the confidence that the grandparents give to you (parents know how their child should be cared for and educated) so that you’re certain your child is in good hands;
– you’re making sure that the baby will be surrounded by love and affection;
– privacy; sometime it’s hard to find someone to trust;

Also, both options have disadvantages. If a “nanny” is always a risk by introducing a stranger to your family and entrusting your most precious “possession” – the child, constantly resorting to your grandparents will generate mixing family roles, and in many cases that leads to the infantilisation of the parents.

Those who choose a nanny assume she’s honest and loves their children. There are, however, cases when the lack of specialist advice and psychological testing prior to a nanny, parents make the wrong choice. The baby sitter may be a person mentally disturbed, aggressive, that has nothing to do around a child (despite the experience she has, or claims that she has).

On top of that, if especially grandmothers tend to usurp and take over the role of mother, some nannies can be emotionally uninvolved or uninterested in the evolution of the child.

When the grandmother assumes the role of mother, the baby’s mind (he hasn’t been explained) will have to deal with confusion regarding parental roles. The confusion will persist for a long time, unconscious.

And there’s always talk that grandparents spoil their grandchildren – perhaps to compensate somet gaps in the relationship with their children when they were small. Of course, pampering is not ruled out for nannies, but it can be limited with greater ease by parents.

Usually, the person who spends the most time with the child becomes like a second mother, reaching sometimes even to occupy first place in his soul. If the mother is forced to leave their baby in the care of someone, you should consider an adjustment period of 1-2 months, that care be taken in parallel and successor mother.

Outdoor Christmas Decorations for the Perfect Season

Christmas DecorationsAn auspicious time of the year to celebrate and rejoice! The time to cherish memories with your family and enjoy the warmth of togetherness – that’s what Christmas is for everyone. So that calls for doing up your abode where all in the family will get together and celebrate. As you know, you will not be able to do justice to the festive mood, if you fail to create the happy environment with proper decorations.

It’s important for you to know how to turn your otherwise dull and sober house to a life-filled one for Christmas. Apart from that the quality time you spend with your family, you need to have in mind decorating your home is important as well.

Outdoor decoration demands some really creative ideas. Manger, stars, Christmas trees and lights being regular components, why not think of something more to spruce up the season this time around?

Why not start thinking with the Christmas wreath? As you know the Christmas wreath is among the must have items, and you now need to finalize as to where all you hang it.

You can have it on the door, low braches of trees and gates to welcome Christmas. This ringed garland is available in different styles, shapes and prices – all you need to do is to choose one which matches your exterior decoration profile.

Don’t forget to pull out the string lights which look breathtaking in the cold dark night. Strings of white light dangling in the cold breeze will be a treat to watch. Available are different types of lightings in the market that can enrich your holiday experience.

Stars floating outside can be of different sizes and shapes. Go for a mix and match style – incorporate traditional ones among the latest film-inspired ones.

Being childish is one liberty you can take while you do up your house during Christmas. Include your child’s ideas extensively in outdoor decorations, we are sure you’ll be surprised. Christmas trees and a manger filled with dolls, paintings and small gifts are also advisable.

Keep in your mind that the act of decoration is as important as the celebration, as it brings back your childhood memories and give your family a sense of togetherness.